(We are introduced to an old lady who goes by the name Doris sat on an old looking sofa in an isolated room) #charliisthebest
Doris – well hello my lovely’s, I guess you’re here to see how a sweet old lady like myself ended up being put into a mad house
Well let me take you all back to when my husband Barry was alive and was living in Nottingham
(scene changes – the room has opened into a dark living room with only a lamp on, Doris is still sat on the sofa but picks up a cross word puzzle book and is sat in front of a tv that is currently not on)
Doris (calling out into the distance) – Barry love?
Barry (replying from a distance) – yes dear
Doris – where is the most common place for a sheep to live?
Barry (walking into the room with 2 cups of tea) – well that is wales of course dear
Doris – oh yeah it is, isn’t it love (chuckling)
Barry – is they anything good on the television tonight dear?
Doris – no not really, same old shit
Barry – there isn’t anything worth watching anymore!
Doris – I agree my love
Barry – well seems they isn’t anything on the TV, I guess I’ll go do some ironing
Doris – oh you are a gentleman aren’t you
(We see Barry walking out of the room with his cup of tea)
(The stage has a black out and we hear a scream from Barry)
(Lights come back on –room has changed we are shown a little girl sat next to Doris on the sofa, watching TV)
Doris – are you hungry summer?
(Summer nods her head)
Doris – well how about your grandma go get you a snack?
(Doris gets up and leaves the room – shortly later Doris screams)
Summer gets worried and walks into the kitchen to see if her grandma is all right)
Summer – grandma?
Doris – oh, yes dear
Summer – why did you scream?
Doris – oh nothing dear, it’s just your grandad, I saw him, standing doing the ironing
(Blackout – next day – we are introduced to a school classroom as the lights come on)
Teacher – ok everyone, hope you’ve all enjoyed drawing today, see you all tomorrow.
(We see summer walking out of the class room and outside and approaches her mother)
Jane (summers mother) – summer, how was school?
Summer – good thanks mum
Jane – is that a drawing I see?
Summer – yes, it is, want to see it?
Jane – oh yes please
(Jane pauses for a few seconds trying to figure out what it is that summer has drawn)
Summer – do you like it? Its grandma
Jane – yes dear, it’s…. Very nice. What’s grandma doing?
Summer – it’s her face when she saw grandad last night
Jane – what do you mean? Your Grandad died years ago
(Blackout – we can here 2 people with one voice sounding like Janes talking about what summer has just told her mother)
Man – what do you mean she saw your dad?
Jane – I don’t know! Summer said she saw him last time she was round her house
Man – well, what should we do?
Jane – I’m not sure. Maybe we should take her to see someone?
Man – I agree she’s crazy!
(Lights come back on to Jane talking to her mother on her sofa later that evening)
Jane – mum.
Doris – yes dear
Jane – we need to talk
Doris – oh, ok what’s wrong?
Jane – it’s about dad.
Doris – I told you already I don’t need any counselling
Jane – no mum, it’s not about the counselling
Doris – well what is it then love?
Jane – at the weekend when summer was round here with you, she said you saw dad?
Doris – yes! Yes, I did he was stood there doing the ironing
Jane – mum, you can’t have seen him
Doris – I know that, but I really did see him, he was stood there in his blue shirt doing the ironing
Jane – look.
Doris – I’m not lying Jane!
Jane – look I think we should go see someone about this
Doris – I’m not going anywhere!
Jane – look you’re not making this easy for me are you? All I want is to check that you are alright and healthy
Doris – I’m perfectly fine Jane
Jane – ok then mother, I’ll leave you alone. I’ll call round tomorrow to check on you
(Jane gets off the sofa and walks off stage as the stage goes to a blackout)
(Still in black out, we here Jane and the man talking again)
Jane – Dave, look she needs help but she’s refusing to go anywhere
Dave – well if she need to see someone so bad, why don’t we trick her into going to see someone?
Jane – great idea but how are we going to convince her?
Dave – what we will do is we will go round tomorrow and I’ll talk to her, ok?
Jane – ok
(Next day – lights come back on to Doris sat on the sofa reading the newspaper)
(Knock on the door – Doris gets up to answer it)
Doris – oh hello love
Jane – hiya mum, how are you?
Doris – good thanks, oh hello Dave
Dave – hello Doris
Doris – what brings you two here?
Dave – well, we would like to invite you somewhere
Doris – oh no, I’m not going to see anyone about Barry
Dave – no Doris, it’s not about Barry, its summer
Doris – oh, is she ok
Dave – yeah, she’s fine she is at school, practicing for a mini school choir that’s on tomorrow night and she asked us if you can come so what do you think… can you come.
Doris – it would be lovely to come
Dave – well then, we will pick you up at 6 tomorrow afternoon
Doris – I’ll be looking forward to it
(The next day – we see Doris getting her shoes on in the living room as lights come back on)
Doris (talking to herself) – I can’t wait to see summers performance
(Knock at the door)
Doris – come in its open
Jane – hello mum, you ready to go?
Doris – yes love, can’t wait!
Jane – let’s go, I must make a quick stop to pick up summer on the way
(We see Jane and Doris exit the stage as the stage goes into a blackout)
(The lights come back on to a doctor’s waiting room)
(Doris and Jane enters)
Jane – Dave should be in here somewhere
Doris – look there he is
Jane – ah yeah, so he is
(Jane and Doris approaches Dave)
Dave – hello Doris
Doris – hiya love, I can’t believe summer sprained her ankle
Dave – no neither can I
Doris – when can we go see her?
Dave – well they said they will call for us to go in
(Lady walks in and asks for David)
(Dave, Jane and Doris all follow the lady off stage)
(As the lights come on we can see a doctor at his desk)
(Doris, Jane and David enter)
Doctor – ah, welcome Doris
Doris – where’s summer?
Doctor – ah well, you see summer is fine we just wanted to check on you?
Doris – me!?
Doctor – yes Doris
Doris (turning to Dave and Jane) – you lied to me!
Jane – mum, you needed to see someone!
Doris – but by lying to your own mother!
Dave – look Doris, if you say nothing’s wrong with you then just let the doctor do his thing
Doris – fine! But I’m telling you now, they isn’t anything wrong with me
Doctor – ok now Doris, I’m just going ask you a few questions
(Light slowly fades till a blackout)
(Lights slowly come back on to a different Livingroom with Jane sat on the sofa)
(Summer walks in the room)
Summer – mum
Jane – yes dear
Summer – can I go see grandma?
Jane – summer, your grandma isn’t very well, the doctor said she needs to spend time alone
Summer – oh no!
Jane – and I don’t think shell want to see anyone
Summer – but grandma always say I cheer her up
Jane – look you can’t go see grandma
Summer – but why mum!
Jane – she’s crazy summer and it’s not safe for you go see her!
Summer – Grandma’s not crazy, she’s kind
Jane – yes but she’s gone crazy ever since your grandad died!
Summer – is it because she screamed?
Jane – yes love
Summer – but she’s only seeing grandad, he scared her
Jane – summer how could she of saw him, he’s been dead for nearly 5 years now
Summer – but mum she’s just imagining him, she probably misses him
Jane (raising her voice) – stop arguing with me summer!
Summer – but grandma is fine! She’s not crazy
(Lights blackout – the lights come back on and we see Dave sat next to Jane on the sofa)
Jane – summers being a right pain the in the arse
Dave – why, what’s she done?
Jane – well she asked me if she could go see grandma
Dave – yeah, and?
Jane – well I told her she’s not well and she won’t want anyone to visit her
Dave – and then what happened?
Jane – well she wasn’t having it. She said that Doris says she always cheers her up
Dave – she does love it when summer goes round
Jane – I know that but she can’t be with her she’s crazy and it’s not safe for her to be around her!
Dave – I know that’s she’s old and all that but are you sure she’s crazy? Like she only saw a ghost
Jane – whose bloody side are you on Dave!
Dave – she’s probably just confused Jane, she’s old and people’s minds play tricks on them when they are confused
Jane – Dave! Stop taking her side
Dave – I’m only suggesting that you might be over thinking the situation
Jane – if you like her that much them why do you go and live with her!
Dave – Jane look, I’m was only saying you might be taking it too far
Jane – you know what Dave, I’ve had enough! Go pack your bags and please leave
Dave – but what about summer?
Jane – you can see her at the weekends
Dave – but Jane are you sure about this
Jane – of course I am Dave
Dave – but all we had was a little disagreement
Jane – Dave look I don’t want to talk about it now! You can stay but I want you gone by Friday night
Dave – ok then Jane. We will need to sort out what’s mine and what’s yours and what’s happening with summer
Jane – fine! You can sleep on the sofa tonight then!
(Lights slowly come back on to Dave packing a box)
Dave (talking to himself) – I can’t believe this! All over me saying that they is a possibility that she’s not crazy! She’s a twat!
(Jane enters the room)
Jane – well that looks about everything
Dave – yep just need to get my toiletries
Jane – here you forgot this
(Jane handing over a shirt)
Dave – oh thanks. Well my rides here so I guess I’ll see you soon
Jane – yep ill text you about having summer round yours
Dave ok thanks. I’m going to miss this place
(Dave exits the stage/room)
(Lights fade to a blackout)
(Lights come back on to a different set up Livingroom)
(Dave walks in and sits on the sofa and picks up a TV remote)
(A phone rings and Dave picks it up)
Dave – hello, oh hi Jane, how’s summer? Oh yeah sure, when? Yeah, I’ll be there in about 10 minutes, ok, thanks, bye
(Dave gets his shoes on and gets up to leave as the lights go to a blackout)
(Lights come on to Janes Livingroom set up with Jane and summer sat on sofa watching TV)
(Knock at the door, Jane gets up to answer it)
Jane – hello Dave
Dave – hiya Jane
Jane (calling into the other room) – summer you ready?
Dave – so how is everything?
Jane – yeah everything’s fine
Dave – that’s good
(Summer approaches the door)
Summer (whilst running up to her dad) – dad!!
Dave – heyy summer! How are you?
Summer – good thanks dad
Dave – that’s good sweetie
Dave – well summer wanna see my new house?
Summer – yeah!
Dave – ok then summer say bye to your mum
Summer – bye mum
Jane – bye summer, have fun
(Dave and summer exit the house and the lights go to a blackout)
(lights come back on to dave’s Livingroom set up)
(Dave and summer enters)
Dave – what do you think of my house then?
Summer – it’s amazing!
Dave – glad you like it
summer – my rooms so big! And full of toys to play with
Dave – summer, how would you like to go see grandma?
Summer – but mum said she’s crazy and won’t want anyone to visit her
Dave – well your mums wrong, grandma loves seeing you
Summer – but what if mum finds out?
Dave – well she doesn’t have to know, this could be our little secret
Summer – yay! Going to see grandma
(Dave and summer exit as lights fade out)
(lights come back on to Doris sitting on her sofa alone reading a book)
(knock at the door)
Doris- oh I wonder who that could be
(Doris opens the door)
Doris – summer!
Summer – grandma!
Doris – I fought your mum didn’t want me to see you anymore
Dave – yeah well that’s her summers visiting me this weekend
Doris – why what’s happened with jane
Dave – oh well she was stupid, I asked if she’s sure about stopping you from seeing summer and she went mad and asked me to leave
Doris – wow! stupid bitch
Dave – yeah well, I’ve got a place of my own now so I have summer at weekends
Doris – good for you love. Come in make yourself comfortable
Doris – do you want a drink summer?
Summer – yes please
Doris – Dave?
Dave – yes please
Doris – tea? Coffee?
Dave – umm tea please Doris
Doris – coming right up
(Doris leaves the room)
(summer stats playing with some toys in a box next to the tv whilst Dave sits on the sofa)
Dave – you happy to be seeing your grandma again
Summer – yeah!
Dave – good
(Doris enters with 2 drinks and gives one to Dave and the other to summer)
Doris – it’s a lovely surprise for you two to turn up
Dave – yeah summer couldn’t wait to come when I told her we would be coming around
Doris – well then, I guess you will have to call round more often
Summer – grandma
Doris – yes love?
Summer – are you crazy?
Doris – what do you mean dear?
Summer – well mu-
(Dave quickly cuts in)
Dave – jane said you’re crazy
Doris – is that why she won’t let me see summer?
Dave – yeah. Its because you saw Barry
Doris – oh gosh, it was only my mind playing tricks on me
Dave – that’s what I tried to tell jane
Doris – it’s just that I miss him
Dave – I know what you mean
(daves phone rings)
Dave – ayup mate
Oh, crap yeah, no problem I’ll be right there yup I’m leaving now
Doris – what’s wrong?
Dave – one of my mates was just involved in an accident
Doris – oh gosh
Dave – yeah, I gotta drive him to the hospital! Do you mind looking after summer?
Doris – yeah, no worries love, go get him to the hospital
Dave – thanks Doris
(Dave walk up to summer and crouches down)
Dave – summer, I’m going to have to nip out you stay here with grandma ok?
Summer – ok daddy
Dave (standing up walking towards the door) – I’ll be back as soon as I can
Doris – take your time love
Doris – you hungry summer?
(Summer nods her head)
Doris – You can help yourself to some chocolate from the fridge dear
Summer – thanks grandma!
Doris – no worries
(summer gets up and walks into the kitchen)
(they are a blackout and we hear a scream from summer)
(the lights come on to summer wrapped up in a blanket on the sofa watching tv)
Doris – how are you feeling now summer?
Summer – ok
Doris – so what happened?
Summer – I saw grandad
Doris – did you?
Summer – yes, I did!
Doris – and what was he doing?
Summer – he was at the table eating
Doris – well whatever you do don’t tell your mum you saw him as she will go mad!
Summer – I won’t grandma
Doris – good, your dad shouldn’t be too long now
(Dave enters the house)
Dave (walking into the Livingroom)– hey, I’m back
Doris – hiya love, was everything ok
Dave – yeah nothing serious
Doris – that’s good dear
Dave – you alright summer?
(Summer don’t move)
Dave – summer?
Doris –she’s a little worked up
Dave – oh how come
Doris – summer, want to tell your dad what happened?
Summer – I saw grandad
Dave – what?
Summer – he was sat in the kitchen eating
Dave – summer he can’t have been
Summer – he was!
Doris – I did tell you he visited
Dave – yeah in your imagination!
Doris – but how could we both see his?
Dave – I don’t know!
Doris – what was grandad waring summer?
Summer – a shirt
Doris – what color was it?
Summer – it was a blue with red stripes on it
Doris – Dave look ill prove it to you, he has that shirt I’ve kept it up in the spare room
Dave – go on then
(Doris gets up and leaves)
Dave – summer your mind is probably playing tricks with you
Summer – but he looked real
Dave – I know but somethings look real when they aren’t
(Dave and summer start to watch TV)
(Doris walks back in empty handed)
Dave – so?
Doris – it’s not there
Dave – like I said you mind is playing tricks on you
Doris – but the other day when I was sorting his things out getting rid of what I didn’t want I saw the shirt and I liked that so I kept it
Dave – yeah, but it’s not there!
Doris – Dave I’m not lying
Dave – now I see why Jane didn’t want summer to see you!
Doris – Dave! Don’t be like this, please
Dave – come on summer, we’re leaving!
(Dave and summer exit as we have a blackout)
(The lights come back on to Jane’s Livingroom set up)
(Jane is sat on the sofa watching TV)
(Knock at the door)
(Jane gets up and answers the door)
Jane – oh hello Dave
Dave – hiya, summers just getting her bag out the car
Jane – ok, how was she
Dave – yeah she was fine
Summer – mummy
Jane – summer!
(Summer runs up to Jane and hugs her)
Jane – you had fun?
(Summer is silent)
Jane – summer you ok?
Dave – she’s probably tired
Jane – oh ok well ill text you about having summer next weekend#
Dave – yeah brilliant
Dave – ok bye summer
(Summer waves Dave goodbye as Dave exits)
(Jane and summer goes and sits on the sofa)
Jane – you tired summer?
(Summer is still)
Jane – summer? You look like you’ve just seen a ghost
Summer – grandad
Jane – what?
Summer – I saw him
Jane – where summer?
Summer – grandma’s house
Jane – when
Summer – this morning, dad took me
Jane – what!
Jane – I told him I didn’t want you to see her
Jane – Dave look summer told me
No Dave I don’t care, I told you I didn’t want summer to see her
Look just don’t bother
I’m not letting you see summer for 2 months now
No I’m not discussing this, bye
(Lights come back on to Doris’s Livingroom setup with Doris on the sofa)
(Knock at the door)
(Doris gets up to answer it)
Doris – oh hiya Dave
Dave – hey
Doris – what brings you here?
Dave – well it’s about summer and Jane
Doris – come in, want a drink?
Dave – no thanks
(They both head for the sofa)
Doris – so what’s wrong?
Dave – well I’ve been stopped from seeing summer for 2 months
Doris – what! Why?
Dave – well summer told her mum that she say grandad
Doris – oh gosh I thought she might say something
Dave – yeah so did I
Can I just nip to the toilet?
Doris – yeah sure, you know where it is don’t you
Dave – yeah, thanks, shouldn’t be too long
Doris – no worries
(Dave gets up and exits the stage)
(Shortly after Dave leaves, we hear a scream from Dave)
(Dave comes running into the Livingroom in a panic)
Doris – what’s wrong dear!
Dave (out of breath) – someone’s in the bathroom!
Doris – what? Who?
Dave – I’m not 100% sure but it looked like Barry
Doris (being cocky) – oh Dave, it’s only your imagination
Dave – no seriously! I saw him
(Lights slowly fade out)